They say "It Takes A Village", and they're right. Let's boil things down to size- Considering that the village is just a bunch of families, we might want to change the phrase to: "It Takes A Family!" When the family speaks and shares the common love for the loved one, and the impact is dynamic. It inspires action, motivates one to change for the better, and provides a definitive vision of the future which is understood by all involved. That's the goal of working with the family as a whole: Unified vision, clearly defined action items and the end game. Create a vision of where one wants to be, then plan the road map on how to get there. One short sentence, one long, hard road made dramatically shorter.
When you create a team out of the village, plan well, offer thoughtful delegation, and lead with clearly defined roles, responsibilities and goals, that team can be surprisingly effective, and overcome resistance effectively.-the structure of Clinical Family Intervention.
Each of us are impacted by the others in our lives, and none more powerful than your mom, dad, sister, brother, and cousins. But the fabric of family is diverse and runs in many weaves: school friends, co-workers, bosses and staff, teachers, and close acquaintances are all in the mix. Take our upbringing, neighborhood influences, regional social impact and politics of the times, then throw the "family/friends" in for good measure, and we come out like we've been through a Wearing Blender- A blended concoction of our experiences. One scoop trauma, one scoop love, pour a few ounces of the rest of our lives and press "BLEND". What comes out is one of the greatest mysteries of life: who we are. You can ask: "How did we get here?", but that's not important at this juncture and can be addressed in therapy after the intervention. The work has just begun. Everyone in the family system needs to be focused on improving the landscape of their loved ones experience upon return from treatment, and in so doing improve their own.
I like to say: "I can't change yesterday, I'm sorry about that, and we have no idea what will happen tomorrow. The past doesn't define you, but your future will. What's important is what you do from this moment on. The only reality is being here, now. You can do something about that, here, now. Shake our hand. Let us help you... help yourself."